The Search for Reminiscence
by NitnatRide
Summary: Read 1st AN. Kai/OC Miwa's twin, Saika, was Kai's old friend, too. They haven't seen each other since he left. What happens when they meet again and start hanging out once more? What kind of things were left unresolved between them? What developments will arise between them? Rated for dark "plot backdrop" and possible future scene.


**THIS FANFICTION CONTAINS SPOILERS. DON'T READ ANY FURTHER UNLESS YOU'VE WATCHED/READ UP TO THE END OF SEASON 1 AT LEAST. **

**So yeah, this fanfic starts after Kai beat the King of the Underground. The episode order might be messed with at first. Let me explain; I know the underground fight is after the Summer Camp, but for character and plot reasons, I've switched those two around. So basically, once introductions etc are over, the characters will be going on the Summer Camp.**

**Warning; this fanfic may seem to move a little fast. Hopefully this will only be the case in the first chapter, but if that would annoy you too much, don't bother reading it. I'd much rather less people read/reviewed it than have loads of people telling me to improve on something which I sometimes can't help doing.**

**For info's sake; I've made Kai, Miwa, Saika (OC), and Misaki 17; Aichi, Morikawa and Izagi are 12/13 (can't decide yet, but might make my mind up later); Kamui and Emi are 8.**

**Hope you enjoy.**

**Fly on,**

**NitnatRide**

**Chapter 1: What We Missed**

**Miwa's POV**

"Seriously though, I can't believe you did something as stupid as challenge those underground thugs. Those guys are bad news even if you can still beat them after they've cheated."

Everything's back to normal now; we're back at Card Capital after a day of lounging in the summer sun.

"Keep your voice down; I've already heard enough of this from you, I don't need the others telling me the same stuff again. I really wish you'd stop talking about it anyway," Kai sighs. "It was yesterday already. And I won, of course. You didn't get hurt, and I got you out of that mess."

I scowl. "I may have been the one to get myself caught but you were the one who started this whole thing."

Strictly speaking, this is true; he was the one who started going to the fights. Of course, I wouldn't have got into this if I hadn't followed him, but pointing that out wouldn't exactly be beneficial for my argument.

"You should stay away from them. Please, I'm asking you as a friend who cares about your welfare. Those guys are no good."

"What makes you think I care about what you think?" he retorts as cold and calm as ever, and I nearly sigh in simultaneous frustration and weariness.** (Ironic thing to say, but I couldn't think of a better one.)** "Besides, do you really think any of those brainless thugs pose a threat to me? What do you know about them anyway? You've never played against them, so you're just judging them by stories you've heard."

Immediately and unwillingly, my hands clench into tight fists on the table, and I can see Kai's eyes flick down to them, his eyebrows drawing slightly together in confusion before looking away again. I dig my nails into my palms to snap myself out of it before taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly.

_No, Miwa. It's not his fault he doesn't know. Snapping at him won't help or change anything._

To distract myself, I think instead about his reaction, and find myself suppressing a smile; he can't hide the fact that he actually _**does**_ care since he looked back at me after my reaction. That initial glee at potential future teasing material disappears quickly as I remember our previous topic.

"Okay, look," I sigh, staring him directly in the eye as he looks at me again. "I didn't want to tell you because it won't really affect you; it happened while you were away, you haven't seen her since you came back, and you probably won't see her. But you remember my twin sister, right?"

"Saika?" he frowns. **(Pronounced s-EYE-ka).**

"Yeah. She had an ass of a boyfriend nearly two-and-a-half years ago. Problem was, no one knew he was an ass until it was too late. He was around our age now, and she was fifteen. He got involved in underground fights, and he was an okay fighter. But he got cocky, and challenged the wrong guy. Totally annihilated, from what I heard. But he was too much of a selfish coward to take the punishment for himself. So he offered them Saika for a night instead."

Kai blinks his eyes once before widening them slightly. Anyone else wouldn't have been able to detect the movement. But I did.

"She was walking home alone one day after going to the grocery store for Mom," I continue reluctantly. "They took her then. We were all really worried when she didn't come home; we knew something was wrong, otherwise she would have called."

My hands clench themselves again as I picture her. "When she came back the next day, she was covered in bruises and scratches. Her clothes were ripped in multiple places. She was walking funny, like it hurt, and there was blood staining her jeans between her legs. But…her eyes…" I swallow. "Her eyes and just…_**her**_…. She was broken, Kai. I've never witnessed or felt such emotional pain."

Swallowing harshly again, I blink fiercely to push back the tears, and take a deep breath to stave off any others. Then I look back up at Kai.

"Just…please be careful."

After a few seconds of silence, Kai actually decides to speak, instead of silently brushing off my warning. "Those idiots I was battling; are they the ones?"

I scowl. "Do you think they'd be alive right now if I knew that they were?"

He sits back again. "You don't know who did it."

I shake my head furiously.

"What happened to the dick?"

If it weren't for what he did, I would have smiled at Kai's name for him. "He came round a few nights after to explain everything – not even Saika knew why they had chosen her until then. How messed up is that? But before I had a chance to kill him, he had the audacity to dump my sister because now she was 'tainted'."

"And _**that's**_ when you killed him."

I smile grimly. "Nearly. He high-tailed it and I lost track of him. That's the only reason he lived. Well, that and the fact that my dad wasn't home when he came."

Kai nods, then looks back towards a game. I raise an eyebrow, his usual coldness grating on my nerves.

"I know you're curious and/or concerned. You're just too cool to ask." I wait until he turns back to me before I continue. "She's okay now. Much happier. She developed anorexia soon after, but got out of it last year. Her success in her college music tech course helps her morale." **(When I say 'college', I mean aged 17/18, not university. I'm British, not American.)**

"Music tech?" he repeats. "She got it then?"

Blinking, I grin at him, surprised. "You remembered that's what she wanted to do."

He shrugs. "Considering how much she went on about it, it's hard to forget."

_Yeah, right_, I think, but don't push the issue.

"So she's fine now?"

"Yeah," I nod, then grimace. "She still has nightmares about them, but they're few and far between now. She often comes to me when she does; you know I've always been her protector."

Just then, the door to Card Capital opens, and a girl our age steps in. I frown in confusion. She looks around calmly, but since I know her really well, I can tell it's something urgent. I'm about to get up and ask her what's wrong, but she spots me and hurries over quietly before I can move. I draw my eyebrows together, shaking my head and stuttering out a bemused "What…?" before simply staring at her. She seems to ignore Kai completely, and studies me, almost examining me for something.

"Mom told me about yesterday," my sister says eventually.

Groaning, I fall forward, resting my forehead on the table. "Awww, man."

"So what, you were going to keep that a secret? You could have been seriously hurt." Her voice may be quiet, but I can still hear the anger in it.

"Yeah, but I wasn't."

No, it hasn't escaped my notice that I'm basically now arguing the side the Kai was on in _**our**_ previous argument. I'm just trying to ignore the irony and hypocrisy, here.

"If I had been hurt, I would have told you everything, I swear," I lift my head and stare into her eyes to show my sincerity. "But I wasn't, so it doesn't matter; it's not like I'm going to go back there again." I flash a glare in Kai's direction, who is just sitting there and looking on, eyebrow raised. "Unlike some people."

He shrugs, even as my sister turns to him, her grey eyes – almost a copy of mine – stormy.

"You're lucky you brought my brother back unharmed, or you'd be half dead by now."

The side of Kai's mouth actually twitches. He's amused by the threat, but because I know him I can tell he's also impressed. Hopefully Saika will see that too. Or hopefully her anger will run out of steam quickly, as many of her grudges do. One of the two would save Kai from being reintroduced to my sister…and her fist.

**Kai's POV**

This is so weird.

As soon as she walked into the shop, I knew it was Saika. But, at the same time, there was a nagging doubt in the back of my mind: _Nah, no way, this couldn't be her._ Any time we were together as kids, she was following us around kind of like a lost puppy. Luckily, neither of us minded that; she was part of our trio, and it wouldn't have been the same without her. But she was always the follower, and always so timid. She was kind of like Aichi when I first met him. And any rare time when she would show her anger, that passed quickly. She certainly never threatened anyone.

And yet, the young woman who walked into Card Capital is strong, self-assured, and on a mission of her own. She starts reprimanding her brother – actually telling him off – and then _**threatens**_ me. I can't help it; watching the whole experience is certainly amusing. But I'd always thought as a kid, _She should get a mind of her own. She should make her own decisions and be proud of them._ Now, right here in front of me is the product of that girl taking my silent advice. It's…well, it's definitely something to behold after all these years.

I'm not going to lie, _**she's**_ something to look at, too; she's obviously filled out at the chest and hips. Her dark denim jeans cling to her thighs before dropping to cover the top of her black Converse. Her dark pink T-shirt hugs her torso in the same way, the bold black letters proudly exclaiming 'These Wings Are Made To Fly'. The words sound familiar, so I'm guessing it's probably a line from a book or song lyrics. Most likely song lyrics, considering her chosen course, the guitars and musical notes dangling from her earrings and the solid- and expensive-looking black headphones slung around her neck, with the wire looping down into a pocket, probably attached to an iPod.

Her skin has the same slightly and naturally tanned look that Miwa's has, and her eyes would be identical to his if it weren't for the slight tinge of blue that becomes more prominent in certain lights. But the neither of them has dull eyes; their hair – not to mention their usual humour and optimism – completely brightens them up, although maybe for different reasons. While Miwa has almost banana-yellow spikes, Saika has dark chocolate-brown waves. From what I can remember, her natural hair is ringlets, thick spaghetti-like tendrils that fall just passed her shoulders. But obviously female adolescence has led her to discover styling products, which leaves her hair smooth and tumbling to just below her armpit. I know that's a weird comparison spot, but I think you know the "real" area I'm talking about, and I am _**not**_ using that. It still looks obviously as thick as an anchor rope – back when they used anchors and/or ropes – but now that's been turned to volume rather than frizz.

Huh, that's a pretty lengthy description. Don't smirk at me like that, you're turning into Miwa. I'm a teenage guy, it's in my job spec to appreciate good female specimens when I see them. It's not as if I just proclaimed my undying love for her.

"That being said," she continues from her previous threat, "you _**didn't**_ let him get hurt. You saved him. And for that, I can't help but thank you."

I find my head tipping forward slightly in acceptance, even though I can't come up with an explanation as to why I acknowledged it a second later.

She glances to the side to study a game going on nearby. "If I'd been in your situation, I'm not sure I would have been able to do the same."

Frowning, I read between the lines of her statement. "You play Vanguard?"

Turning back to me, she shrugs. "Not as often and certainly not as well as either you or Miwa, or probably anyone in this shop. Some of us actually have work set for over the summer, you know."

I ignore her jest. "You'd be surprised at how many losers there are here. You want to fight to see how good your skills are?" _Okay, where did that come from?_

She doesn't seem surprised at my offer as she shakes her head, although her brother appears to be bordering on a heart attack. "I left my deck at home. I don't treasure it like some people. That kind of dedication is saved for my sound system, instruments, iPod and headphones." She grins.

At the familiarity of the conversation, Miwa's health improves again. "Speaking of summer work, have you finished your third album yet?"

I had planned to ignore them both for the remainder of the conversation, but that word surprised me. "Album?"

Saika smirks at me. "I'm not a superstar just yet, before you try and woo me for the fame and fortune." I make a face at her.

"An album is just the name for the collection of compositions that's asked of a student for assessment, whether it's the real deal or just a check-up on progress. The usual minimum recommendation is one per semester, but the requirement is one per year."

"Saika's compositions are amazing," Miwa beams at his sister. "She plays a lot of the instruments herself, and she does the vocals too. Anything she can't play, or if the song needs editing a little, she uses the sound system software we got her for her laptop, or uses the more extensive and complex sound desk in the college. Or she asks someone from her college who can play it. She runs them by me, Mom and Dad before she submits them, and they're really awesome to listen to."

For a horrifying yet wonderful second, I'm eight-years-old again, proudly holding up a picture I drew at school to my parents, and relishing their praise as Mom frames it and puts it on the hallway wall and Dad ruffles my hair. But now I'm back, staring at Miwa and Saika as they beam at each other, their love for each other and their family evident in their bright eyes. Using my nails to dig into my arm under the table, I successfully redirect the sudden stinging in my eyes to a different part of my body. Once calm again, I slyly check around the shop, but it appears no one, not even Saika or Miwa, saw my momentary loss of control.

_What the hell was that?_ I ask myself. _Why did that suddenly happen? The rare times when that happens, it doesn't come so quickly or spontaneously. What's different this time?_

"So this is Card Capital?" Saika's voice breaks me out of my introspection as she surveys the room, obviously impressed.

"Sure is," Miwa beams at her.

She makes a face. "I'm not really sure what I expected, but it sure wasn't this." She blinks, seemingly stunned. "Wait…is that Misaki Tokura behind the desk?" She glances around the store. "And Kamui Katsuragi? And Aichi Sendou, over there? This is where Team Q4 was born?!"

Confused and exasperated, I shrug. "How did you _**think**_ the others knew me?"

She turns back to me, a strange look on her face. "I wasn't sure," she said, an odd tone in her voice, too. "You don't exactly have a habit of staying in one place anymore."

And there it is; the gauntlet is thrown. That look in her eyes – what I can now see to be bitterness and anger, both rarely seen from this girl – burns marginally brighter, as if daring to say that has given her more courage to show it.

So I do nothing but meet her gaze levelly, small glimpses of meaning and emotion sparking between us. Mostly from her, of course. But soon the sparks turn to waves, and then even they die down to ripples before she looks way.

_You never could hold a grudge._

I almost say it, but I realise that, even in my head, it sounds too fond and emotional and less like an insult than I would like.

"I'm sorry," she says quietly. "It's just…these past years have been pretty tough for me as well. An extra friend, especially one as close as you used to be, would have helped a lot."

My scowl lifts up a bit, as I'm reminded of what Miwa just told me. When she walked in, I wouldn't have guessed all that had happened to her, but now, as we see the carefully constructed exterior start to crack, I can see exactly how it's changed her. Uncomfortably, I can't help but notice that her defence mechanisms in that respect are so similar to mine, and my empathy rises. Not to mention the fact that she hasn't forgotten my life when she includes me in the sentence with 'as well'. But the part that shocks me the most in that sentence is how much it hurts for her to describe our friendship – our _**close**_ friendship – in the past tense. I don't know why; it's not as if I've been spending time with her since I got back. In fact, I haven't seen her at all. So why does it bother me so much that we might have lost what we had?

I shake the feeling before I get too engrossed in its analysis, and find a perfect distraction when I hear Aichi's voice, for once not directed at me. **(I know Kai wasn't there in the episode at this time, but for plot purposes i.e. what you've just read, he needs to be.)**

"I want you to help me get stronger," he begs – or demands – of Shin. "I want you to train me, 'cuz I know I can take it to the next level."

Fine, I'll admit it; I'm impressed with his new-found confidence. It's certainly out of character for him, but that little kick I gave him yesterday really seems to have worked; he's really fired up.

Soon enough, the grade-schooler and Misaki are joining in, signing up for this training that has yet to take form.

Or maybe not; Shin proudly presents a poster he'd obviously prepared before.

"Card Capital's Summer Training Boot Camp!"

"Oh, wow!" Saika grins, spinning back to face us after observing that scene, her eyes bright. "That sounds amazing!"

Miwa chuckles. "I know, right? Sounds pretty great, huh?" He turns to me.

Raising my eyebrow, I scoff then look away, folding my arms. "You're joking. It'll be full of no one but losers and weaklings."

Usually, Miwa would just be all like, "Oh, come on!" and try and persuade me to go. This time, I'm met only with silence, and my curiosity and confusion as to the reason for this shift in norm convinces me to open my eyes and investigate.

Miwa's face is set in a grimace directed at his sister, but she's paying no attention. She's staring openly at me, and when I say openly, I mean with all her emotions evident in her eyes, tumbling in the tempest that now resides there. Shock. Confusion. Disappointment. Anger. Pain.

"Those loser and weaklings are your teammates," she insists, her voice managing to be softer and firmer at the same time. "Yeah, you may be better than them, but if so, you teach them. Never look down on someone unless it's to help them up."

Before I can respond – or even recover – she walks out of the shop as promptly as she entered it.

As I stare after her in perplexity, Miwa emits something between a groan and a sigh, and I turn to see him pushing the heels of his hands into his eyes then run his fingers through his hair. He rests his cheek on his hand, more defeated than his usual casual stance.

"In case you've forgotten those first few years at elementary school, we used to be losers and weaklings, too, until we banded together and grew up a bit. Hearing you talk like the guys who used to push us around must be hard on her, especially since those street thugs probably called her weak that night as well."

He gets up and rushes out to catch her up, giving me a look that is as close to accusatory as he can get. "You might want to think about what you say around a traumatised young woman who used to be one of your best friends."

As I watch the 'protector' chase after his sister, for the first time in my life I hate my naturally cold social reaction. Well, it's natural now, anyway; it wasn't before, and that's why Saika was upset by it. By me.

Sighing, I ignore the joyful and excited discussion about that camp and stand up, placing my hands in my pockets and keeping my head down as I make my way out of the shop. Glancing to the right (for some reason), I can just about see Miwa catching up to his sister on her BMX bike. I watch them for a little longer before turning away, and walking in the opposite direction.

**Miwa's POV**

About thirty seconds after leaving Card Capital, I reach Saika on her bike. If she'd really wanted to avoid me, she'd have been peddling faster, and I never would have been able to catch up to her. So I'm glad she isn't too mad with me. Maybe she'll give me a chance to explain about him, and why I kept the extent of his personality change from her.

"Saika. Saika, you okay?"

She's looking dead ahead, her eyes blazing. Her hands clench around the bike handles, trying to grasp what she's just seen and heard.

"You said he was different," she says, her voice trembling with tears and anger. "You didn't say he had changed into the kind of person we all agreed to hate. How could this happen? Does he have no respect for himself? For our friendship?"

I let her finish her rant, knowing that in this situation, it's best for her to get as much of it out as possible. The betrayal of a long-term and intense friendship will result in a longer grudge than usual.

"I didn't tell you so you'd have a little more hope for him," I explain softly, and she looks at me. "Something's changed him. And sometimes it's hard to see my old friend in there. But he is in there, I know it. He's just put up defences, so many that it's completely hidden him. I thought if he had both of his old best friends, he'd be more likely to let them down." I laugh quietly. "If he had just you, he'd still be more likely to open up than with me."

Since I started my explanation, Saika's been looking ahead thoughtfully, but after I say that, she blinks and studies me curiously. "What do you mean?"

"Oh, come on," I say. "Kai and I may have been the ones who almost always messed around together, but you were always there. Besides, you and him had the most one-to-one time, actually talking or just being silent with each other. Either way, you two were the ones who were the most serious and less likely to completely goof off. Right now, I think Kai needs a serious talk, or someone to listen to him. Even though I think he secretly likes my jokes –" I grin. "– I don't think he's ready to start participating in that just yet."

She's gone back to considering my words, and I keep quiet to let her mull it over. After a minute or so, she speaks again, quietly, hopefully.

"Do you really think our friendship, our time together, meant that much to him?"

I smile gently at her, and shrug. "Did it mean that much to you?

Her mouth opens slightly as she emits a small gasp. She grins, and shyly glances at me before nodding.

After a brief pause, I continue. "Kai seems to be alone for much of the time, and I'm not just talking about physically. If we both remind him of a time when he was _**never**_ alone, in any way, shape or form, I think he'll start to relax." I smile sadly. "And start to feel happy again."

Saika's face scrunches up, like she's about to cry; her high levels of empathy mean she cries for pretty much anyone for pretty much any reason. After shaking her head, she stares ahead again, her eyes blazing once more, but not with anger.

"Okay," she says. "Kai deserves to be happy. And if I can help make that happen, then I'll do anything."

_I know you will,_ I think, smiling at her. _I remember you two. You'd do anything for each other._

**So that's chapter 1, and that's Saika. Hope you liked them both. Please leave a little review just so I know that you want to read more. Constructive criticism is most welcome.**

**Fly on,**

**NitnatRide**


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